Renewal

Finally, a new blog!
Let me tell you, I have learned a lot since December 10, 2010 (aka last blog post). And praise God for that. but, I'm not really sure where to start with this. July 10th was a super awesome day for me....I got baptized by one of my most admired spiritual leaders, Steve! Beforehand I was TERRIFIED, how silly right? I think I was just nervous for all the people and I think that was the enemy's way of creepin on into that experience. When I said terrified I mean like almost backed out. BUT I OVERCAME!
That single moment of my life was the first personal, 100% genuine encounter with God I have ever experienced. Even hearing the words "dead to sin" when I was emersed under the water and then the proclamation that I was "alive in Christ!" seemed like it was straight out of a movie....slow motion and with an awesome light show/getting it together pop song in the background (fyi it was just in my head not in real life). In that moment I knew I was forgiven and I was loved and I was planned and I was important. And although I'd experienced all those feelings seperately and generally more than once, nothing will ever top that experience. like ... cannot even compare! That was grace. that was love. that was PEACE! I could talk about it for hours and you still won't be able to comprehend the awesomeness. so I'll stop myself now.

In that peace though, there was still a call to action. and I think that is so significant. I think sometimes it's so easy to use god as an excuse to stop doing hard things, or to just stop doing in general. but after this experience i've realised that the closer you are to god, the more he puts on your heart. and that's tough. but so encouraging! the creator of the UNIVERSE wants ME to DO SOMETHING IMPORTANT??? just blows me away.
and when i say do something i don't necescarily mean solve world hunger, even though that would be great. i mean do something as in intentionally perform some action to honor god. i didn't have to look too far to find what that looked like for me. i needed to get out of this sin-soaked relationship. (don't think i'm super sketch) so i did it. and it hurt, and it still stings and i'm still sad and i still wish it didn't have to be that way. but the beauty is that I AM CONFIDENT for the first time in my whole life that god wants me to do this. so i'mmma do it, darn it! ask anyone close to me...i wouldn't have the strength to do that before being welcomed into the Kingdom on July 10th in the middle of Forrest Park. I have a story now! I can identify when I chose to follow christ and how that changed my life and how glorious god is! and even though that requires this struggle, I'm lovin every second of this growth.

speakin of struggle...I'm leaving for college soon. and recently i've just been feeling crazy crazy craaaaazy overwhelmed. and over the silliest things....like what if i need a cough drop and i won't have one? or what if i have no job and i loose my room key so i can't get in my dorm? or what if i don't like my bath caddy? HOW RIDICULOUS RIGHT!? but some fears are legitimate. the whole new friends thing is super exciting...but also extremely terrifying. and i'm not living with my parents? hellllloooo who will do my laundry? and clean up my messes? i'm just afraid to be an adult, or to step out of my comfort zone I guess. but you know, i will be fine. and i will love Anderson University. and I will grow! and this is gonna be a great four years! so thank you friends for your support, for your overlooking of my poor spelling and grammar within this, for letting me rant, and for being who you are, really. Blessings!